Why are we so tight lipped about sex with our health care providers especially after 50, Whether it’s high cholesterol or aches and pains, talking about our health issues is something most of us do without hesitation. But when it comes to sexual and reproductive health the conversation doesn’t flow as freely When was the last time your doctor asked you about sex in your life, many times when seeing a provider, it is about your complaint, But that’s another whole blog. Enjoying fulfilling intimate relationship after 50 means bringing the topic of sexual health out of the dark and into the light.

In a recent National Poll on Healthy Aging by the University of Michigan, most respondents (76%) agreed that sex is a vital part of a romantic relationship at any age. Yet only 17% of older adults had brought up the subject of sexual health with their healthcare providers. A big reason is that sexual health tends to be a taboo topic. The problem is that when we avoid discussing a topic, it can become plagued with misconceptions and stereotypes. It can also be harmful to our health. For example, not sharing your sexual struggles with your doctor could cause a serious underlying medical condition to be overlooked. Why are we fearful or anxious when he comes to discussing this topic?

According to the American Sexual Health Association (ASHA), sexual health is “the ability to embrace and enjoy our sexuality throughout our lives.” It means, among other things, being able to enjoy sexual pleasure and satisfaction, having access to sexual health education and resources, and being able to talk freely about sexual health with your partner and others. 

Sexual health does not end. what age does a man slow down sexually? At what age does a woman stop being sexually active? There’s no specific age when sexuality “stops.” After all, humans are sexual beings by nature—and you don’t suddenly lose all interest in sex just because you turn 50.

In fact, sexual health is critically important as we age. First, it allows us to create and maintain emotional intimacy and a sense of closeness with our partner. Sex has also been shown to help reduce stress by releasing a hormone that helps us feel more relaxed. It is also part of our overall health. For example, engaging in regular sex can reduce our risk for high cholesterol and even lower blood pressure. The reverse is true as well. What effect does physical health have on sexuality? Exercising regularly can help improve stamina, leading to longer-lasting intercourse. It also improves blood flow to sexual organs, which is necessary for both arousal and orgasm.

Our bodies change as we get older—but it doesn’t have to stand in the way of a healthy sex life. The changes men and women undergo during the aging process can have a direct impact on our sexual wellness. For instance: Women experience significant changes before, during, and after menopause such as loss of libido, weight gain, hot flashes, hair loss, and lower mood. In addition, the vagina can change shape and lose its natural lubrication, having sex uncomfortable and less enjoyable. In men, erectile dysfunction (ED) is common. Achieving an erection may take longer and lack in potency. Prostate changes can occur, too. Beyond the natural changes of aging, there are several lifestyle factors, medical conditions and medications that can affect our sexual health. Most Importantly if you are wondering, how do I maintain Sexual activity and enjoy it, the following may help.

1. Talk to your doctor. Keep in mind that sexual health is just as important as other aspects of your health. If you’ve never broached the subject with your healthcare provider before, now is the time to start. Whether you’re experiencing low libido, ED, or vaginal discomfort, you’re not alone. There are likely medications and treatments your doctor can suggest helping remedy your symptoms.

If your provider doesn’t bring up the topic of sexual health at your next check-up, don’t be afraid to initiate a dialogue. It’s important to be able to advocate for yourself to get the care and guidance you need. Asking questions is a good place to start. Below are some examples of sexual health questions you can pose to your doctor:

• Can we incorporate sexual health into my annual checkups?
• Sex is painful/difficult/impossible for me due to _____. What options do I have to address this problem?
• What are the potential sexual side effects of the medications I’m taking?
• Should I get tested for STDs—and what questions should I ask my partner?

2. Talk to your partner. Discussing sex with your partner may feel uncomfortable at first, but with practice, you’ll feel more at ease. Good communication is essential to a healthy relationship as well as an active, mutually satisfying sex life. Be open about what you expect from an intimate relationship—your likes and dislikes—and encourage your partner to do the same. If libido is a problem, consider issues in the relationship that may be inhibiting your desire for one another. A licensed therapist can help you explore and break through these relationship roadblocks.  

3. Live healthy. What benefits your overall health will also benefit your sex life. That’s why living a healthy lifestyle is a big part of maintaining good sexual health. In addition to seeing your doctor regularly for preventive care and adhering to prescribed medication regimens, take care of yourself by:

• Making smart food choices
• Exercising regularly
• Avoiding alcohol in excess
• Avoiding or eliminating tobacco use
• Maintaining a healthy weight
• Practicing stress-reduction activities (e.g. yoga or meditation)

Sexual health is a vital component of a long life, reach out to your doctor, and if you do not get the answers, you want to look for functional medicine physicians, therapists sometimes a second opinion can be the help you need. 

Stay healthy, be active and be open to discuss.